You hook up a date on Tinder, both of you get along well and go ahead to plan several engagements to get to know each other better. Then the big question comes, “are you in love?”
In a culture saturated by quick hookups and one night stands, that question lingers in everyone’s minds. True, everyone desires to love and be loved, but many don’t know how the whole love thing works. You start seeing someone and after some time begin to question your feelings saying; it’s only been three days, or a week, or a month, or a year. Maybe it’s meant to be like that, or perhaps not.
The subject of how long it takes to fall in love has been one several psychologist have tried to answer. However, even they, seem to have no definite answer. The consensus many have come to is that the way love works is as varied as the number of people on earth. Perhaps, it is impossible to know where to draw the lines between crushing on someone, lust, infatuation, and actual love, all of which are emotional activities.
Sooner or Later?
Based on the fact that love comes for people in different ways, it’s difficult to place a specific time frame. For some, a romantic date is enough to get them head over heels in love while for others it takes about a year before admitting to loving someone. Therefore, it can come sooner or later, depending on the conditions.
Nevertheless, it is generally advised to wait sometime before committing your love to someone you like. This is because many people who hurriedly declare love and enter into relationships race out the way they began. Don’t get it wrong, if you want it early, go for it. The point is that it is better to wait some time and consider a lot of things before you can say you are in love. Even then, the big question remains: how do you know if you are in love already? That’s the more reason to wait as many people who think they are in love actually just have a crush on the other person and soon back out.
Now to the critical questions; how can you tell that you are in love? How long does it take to fall in love? What are the signs to watch out for? Well, here are some answers you’d find helpful.
Beauty, they say, is in the eyes of the beholder, and this is true when it comes to love. People you love would always look attractive to you, even if otherwise to other people. You really should check yourself if you like someone but don’t find them attractive. It may be a sign that you aren’t in love after all.
Your Brain Kicks In
Love is based on emotions. So one way to know you love someone is that you feel some sense of emotional attachment to them. They occupy your minds always, and you can’t seem to get the thoughts away. There is a hormone your brain releases, phenylethylamine when you are in love that gives you feelings of excitement when you think about the lucky person. It’s called the ‘love drug’ and is also found in chocolates (that’s why everyone loves them, right?). However, this is not all that matters as this kind of feeling exists when it’s infatuation too. You need to be careful to not mistake one for the other.
The more you love someone, the more time you desire to spend with them. It’s just normal. As you feel love for someone, they improve in your scale of importance, and you want to be around them. When you do, relish those moments and use them to get to know the other person well. It will go a long way to determine if you are compatible in the long run.
A good relationship is built on trust. And one of the signs that you love someone is when you trust them. You become more comfortable sharing your innermost secrets with them. Everyone feels this vulnerability when they are in love. If you think you love someone and don’t trust them enough to share secrets, you really should evaluate your feelings to know if you genuinely love them.
True love is selfless, meaning you would always want to see the person you love happy. When you find out that you are gladly willing to sacrifice anything to protect or make someone happy, then congratulations, friend, you’re probably in love. As said above, when you are in love, you don’t think about yourself always but about the other person more.
Perhaps the most evident sign that someone is your soulmate is when you plan your life and include them in those future plans. That shows you want to be with them for a long time. Many people plan their weddings, future home, kids and so on, with the person they have feelings for, and if you fall into this category, that’s a huge green light. However, ensure the person feels the same, so you don’t jump the gun and hurt yourself in the process.
It is important to note that no single factor determines that you are in love. For almost everyone, it is a combination of the factors explained above. When all those factors are checked, you would probably delete your Tinder account. LOL. Well, it just shows you’ve finally found your soulmate.
Finally, falling in love does affect your mood. People who are in love tend to feel happier and more satisfied with life, and it’s a great experience. You may have been expecting a specific time frame it takes to fall in love. Unfortunately, there is no time frame for love to happen. Everyone is different. But to assure you, when it does happen, you would know. Please take your time.